I spent some time in the prayer chapel yesterday before TNL, and the Lord and I spent some good quality time together. When I got up to leave, the Lord struck me with a clear revelation, and its message has left me feeling heavily burdened. You know that feeling when you have bad news to give someone, and you really don't want to? That's where I have been all day.
Anyway, when I was leaving the prayer chapel, I noticed that the church has several depictions of lions in the room (stained glass, statue, etc). That's when the Lord struck me with this vision.
In case you don't know, C.S. Lewis, author of the great Narnia Chronicles (among other well respected works of fiction and non-fiction), chose to create an allegorical story in which Jesus was represented by a massive and awesome lion named Aslan. You may have seen the movies, if you haven't read the books (shame on you). Just about every person I know and respect in the world looks on Lewis's work with a great deal of respect, and most generally agree that his writing was God-breathed in many ways. Many of the posters in this little community have shared in conversations with me in the past in which we have discussed these very things.
So, as I was leaving the chapel, and I saw the lions, I thought to myself "lions are sweet...they remind me of Aslan, and Aslan reminds me of Jesus...I should get more stuff with lions on it." That was my first thought. My second thought was this: "you know, I do have SOME stuff with lions on it...Chelsea's crest is a regal looking lion...cool".
This was the first vision that jumped into my mind:
Notice the similarities. the first picture is Aslan. the second is the representation of Aslan on a Narnian sheild as envisioned by the filmakers. The thrid is obviously Chelsea's crest. Clearly, the Lord was revealing to me that, in fact, Chelsea is a team that is blessed by God, and that anyone who supports Chelsea supports Jesus.
If that was as far as my vision went, I would not feel so heavy hearted. But, alas, the Lord had more to reveal to me.
My thoughts then jumped to other teams and their crests. Of course, I immediately thought of Liverpool. Liverpool's crest features a long beaked bird. That is where the lighting bolt struck me and I realized with horror what the Lord was trying to tell me.
You see, C.S. Lewis used many other animals and creatures in his stories. Most of thsoe animals and creatures were good, but some were bad. One creature in particular appears in his final installment of the Chronicles of Narnia (The Last Battle). That particular creature shows up as the avatar of a being known as Tash. Tash is, essentially, the allegorical representation of the anti-christ. Satan. Tash is very, very bad, but he gets many many people to follow him (even some people who are good, but they are deceived by Tash and follow him instead of Aslan). It is very sad, and lots of bad things happen because of Tash.
Here's a depiction of Tash:
Uh oh...
Here's a picture of Liverpool's bird:
Uhhhhh....did anyone else just get the shivers? I mean, there are red flames of hell all around the bird. Good LORD!
That my friends, is the sad revelation I bring to you today. Anyone who supports Liverpool clearly is being decieved, and in essence, they are supporting the antichrist. The message is clear; supporting Liverpool=supporting Tash=devil worshiper. C.S. Lewis can't be wrong.
Support Chelsea FC. Turn to the light. Turn to the Lion. Turn to Jesus.
4 comments:
tremendous post, potentially the best one ever. well played. i'm not even going to rebut in this comment. that was too good.
in related news, is there any technology out there beyond blogger that might allow for easier bantering (notably: replies with images/video)? i'm always on the hunt.
As a pastor in this community, let me protect us from bad theology. As much as Sim knows about choosing a non-tool-laden footie club, he knows less about the Kingdom as footie metaphor. A few corrections to note...
1) Compare the directions that Aslan, the shield, and the chelsea lion are facing. Sim, as a Christ-figure, wouldn't your lion be facing the same way? And what would we say about a lion facing the opposite way? Perhaps a truer anti-Christ figure. A pure theological example of one masquerading as an Angel of Light
2) No connection can be made between anything godly and a club that fields Dive-ia Drogba. Talk about satanic...
3) Please examine a Liverpool crest:
- the Liverbird holds an olive branch in it's beak - a sign of peace and a messianic prophecy
- the lampstands in the crest depict one of the most frequent symbols of divine presence: fire. See the pillar of, the burning bush, the lampstands of Revelation
- the top of the crest features the gates to the Kop. Note that Jesus called himself the gate (John 10:7)
- the famous slogan "you will never walk alone" sounds awfully familiar if you consider Jesus parting words in Matthew: "And surely i am with you always, to the very end of the age"
So Sim, please learn your place in the world's of theology and footie. The shallow end. You don't belong out in the deep waters of Truth.
Oh, SNAP.... that was good
I'm starting to see now. Brian must be like the Ape in he story (the one who really manipulated things and took advantage of the Ass). I always wondered if Brian liked to manipulate ass...
Brian, as you point out, the Chelsea lion has it's head facing the opposite direction of Aslan. I can see how you might want to manipulate the situation and suggest that makes him an anti-christ figure. However, anyone who knows their scripture knows this:
Isaiah 6:
"In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces...
and later...
“Woe to me!” I cried. “I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty.”
Now, you see, the seraphim and Isaiah both were smart enough to know that looking at God was not a good idea. The Chelsea lion is clearly not trying to BE Jesus; the Chelsea lion is trying to be like Jesus as best he can. He still recognizes that he is not worthy to look upon the Lord though...that would essentially be a Luciferian mistake. For the lion to hide his face from the glory of God is simply an act of reverence.
Also, I appreciate your scorn for Drogba, Brian. I do. However, we all had the pleasure just this Tuesday of listening to Chip speak about the redemption and healing that can come from even the foulest of people. I am certainly glad that the people of Israel had not spurned Rahab as you are spurning Didier...we would never have seen David, or even Jesus, had Rahab been treated as she deserved to be. I'm pretty sure jesus chose to spend most of his time with the prostitutes and tax collectors, not the pharisees. Clearly Didier was drawn to Chelsea by the Lord's divine will...it is his only hope of becoming a better man.
As for the fire, of course you would suggest that those fires around the bird are the fire of God...however, your argument is unsound because there are just as many references, if not more, to fire in a negative context as there are in a positive context in the Bible (see James 3, 1 Kings 16, Deut 32, Mark 9, Luke 17 etc etc for examples) My 2 favorite examples of evil fire would be Isaiah 9:18..."Surely wickedness burns like a fire", and of course, the most appropriate for this context, John 15:6 "If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned." Are you sure you want to keep exalting that little branch in the Tash-bird's mouth?
Now, regarding your ridiculous gate reference, I really have to call you to task here. Do I really need to point out that "wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it." Sure does sound to me like a broad road though a wide gate is a great way to be sure "you'll never walk alone." Me, personally, I would rather choose the narrow gate that few choose, if it means I will get to spend my days with Jesus instead of with burning with a Tash-bird.
Brian, I am a bit concerned that as one of the spiritual leaders of our community you would demonstrate such a disturbing lack of discernment when it comes to these matters. I'm wondering if I should perhaps mention to the Elders the sorts of heretical theology that you are supporting? i'm also curious why my wife is working at an institution that would actually sign off on people with your mindset. perhaps I should look into her taking a job at a sound theological institution like CCU...
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